My job-seeking client looked to be about 44 and was convinced that she wasn't getting hired because of her age. Her actual age was 49.
As I listened to her I realized that I hadn't had a moment's concern about her age. She seemed experienced, and that seemed like a good thing. Most of the people I talked to about age discrimination were at least a decade older.
Her view was different. She was competing for a sales position that frequently attracted newbies in their twenties. She naturally looked a few years younger than she was but also clearly spent time and money creating a more youthful appearance.
Age discrimination is real. 17,837 charges of age discrimination were filed with the EEOC in their last fiscal year. The EEOC recovered $60 million in monetary benefits for charging parties. This figure does not include benefits obtained through litigation!
Considering how few people are willing to go to the effort to file a claim, I'd guess that well over 30,000 people last year perceived themselves as victims of age discrimination.
OK, plenty of people are discriminated against because of their age. Plenty of people aren't. We may never be sure whether we are victims of such discrimination. One important task I have with clients is to help them recognize what they have control over and what they don't.
My client may have been right - perhaps hiring managers were consciously or
unconsciously seeking someone younger for their positions. That was not in
her control. But as it happened, her resume and her job interviewing
skills needed tweaking, and those were things she could actually do
something about.
Before we started working together she was obsessed with the idea that she was too old to get a job. She felt like a throwaway from society. Everything she did and every thought she had relative to finding a job was tinged with the belief that she was too old and no one wanted her.
We talked about how that negative self image might be seeping through to prospective employers. It's quite a trick in interviews to sell yourself, be "real", be optimistic, and be honest when you are feeling defeated, pessimistic, defensive and trying to give an interviewer what you believe she wants to see and hear.
Since my client did not want to change the focus of her job search, she agreed to toss away as best she could her anxiety about age discrimination. It wasn't helping her, and it was hurting her a lot.
After working on her interviewing skills, she landed a job she was thrilled with in the industry she had been convinced didn't want her.
To my client, focusing on what she could control meant putting away the obsessive worry about age discrimination.
To someone else, it might mean choosing a different career path, choosing to complain to a CEO about treatment during an interview process or choosing to file a discrimination claim with the EEOC. (And then putting away the obsessive worry about the outcomes that were out of her control!)
Age discrimination exists, and you might be the victim of it now or at some time in the future. There's a balance to strike between naivete and paranoia. There are sensible steps you can take. Educate yourself about what's legal and what's not. Know your rights. Don't stop networking. Seek support.
But please don't unnecessarily curtail your dreams because you're afraid people will think you're too old. Don't assume that everything is about your age. Plenty of people in responsible positions couldn't care less how old you are. The workforce is aging, and plenty of folks plan to work beyond the traditional retirement age. Don't let the media stories about experienced managers with good salaries being replaced by inexpensive youngsters create such worry that you can't sleep.
I'm interested to hear your story. When have you witnessed age discrimination? In what form did it take? How worried are you about it?
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